Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Mom Forcing Daughter to Have Abortion?

This past Saturday morning, we watched a mother, a woman about my age, go out to the Planned Parenthood escort, so that her daughter would not be distracted by the people across from the parking lot, while she walked into the center.  The people who consisted of counselors from the Waterleaf crisis pregnancy center, our high school girls standing there holding signs like "Stop Abortion Now" and "Planned Parenthood Lies" and "Planned Parenthood Kills Babies".

So the escort, in a florescent vest, like you would see on a construction worker, walked over a little closer to where the mother parked.  The girl then walked behind them by a few yards as they made their way into the center.  I didn't see her face, but I know she must have been young, because she was wearing a pink hoodie and pink sweat pants.  I think that color pink goes into hiding when a girl becomes a woman, until she is preparing for a baby girl.

The question in my mind was, "Does that girl have a choice?"

I wondered if her Mom and the Planned Parenthood telemarketing team and on-site counselors explain the choices.  A choice of giving life to a baby, and perhaps giving the child up for adoption to a couple that will love and care generously for the child, or putting the baby to death, and dealing with the grief of that decision for many years into the future, until the Lord would forgive and heal her.  Or what I hope I would do if one of my daughters gets pregnant before marriage . . . offer to adopt and raise the baby as my own, or as her own, but in my home with as much secrecy and privacy as my daughter needs.

How strong would any of us have been if our mother, who loved and cared for us were telling us things like, "This is the best way.  You should have a child when you are older, when you are married, when you can afford to give that child a good life.  It won't take long, and no one needs to know."

We know Planned Parenthood says things like, "It is an emotional decision, but know that 1 in 3 women has had an abortion."  I got this from a youtube Planned Parenthood video on surgical abortion.

Where do they get that statistic?  Do they take the total number of aborted babies, and do we even have accurate data on that, and then divide it by the population of women in the world?  Do we have that...even if we calculate it just for the U.S.A., do we know how many aborted children there are to divide it?  I just don't think that number is accurate, considering that there is actually a market for aborted baby parts (Korean "vitality pills", some food manufacturers testing, stem cell research).

Maybe if they included women that used birth control that acts as an abortificient as the third method of preventing a pregnancy by weakening the endometrium so a fertilized egg cannot implant, or those that have used IUDs that do the same thing.  Somehow I have hard time believing that 1 in 3 women in the U.S. have had a surgical abortion.  Maybe 1 in 10 have an abortion . . . which is still high, or maybe 1 in 20 have multiple abortions?

One of the adults that came last month came again this month.  She is the one that had an abortion as a young woman, and had spoken in the chapel to the High School kids.  She brought her grandchild, a 6 year old, 1st grader with her.  One of the people we met was an organizer for "I Regret My Abortion".  At her request, she gave a button to this Grandma.  I was curious how the woman would handle it when her granddaughter saw the button.  I didn't have to wonder for long.

"Grandma, why are you wearing that button?"
"Well, when I was a young woman, 48 years ago, I was pregnant and I went into a place like this.  There wasn't anyone outside telling me that what was inside me was a baby.  I had an abortion."

The little girl didn't say, "Oh, Grandma!  How could you?" or anything similar. She didn't seem shocked at all.  Instead she ran right back beside the other girls and picked up her Stop Sign again.  She made the connection that it might have helped her grandma not to have the abortion if she would have seen someone letting her know it was a baby inside her, and that there were people who could help her.

It was an amazing thing to see.  I walked this little girl over to the Dominick's so we could both use the bathroom.  I have a son the same age, and I think I know when they are happy or sad or in between.  She was fine.  She didn't seem sad or upset about the news from her Grandma.

I told the Grandma afterward, how brave I thought she was.  That I thought it was easier to tell strangers, high school kids she didn't know, than to tell her own Grand-daughter.  She said she had never talked about it publicly before talking in the high school chapel the previous month.

It turns out both the little girl and the Grandma have had quite a bit of suffering in their lives.  The Grandma grew up in two different Catholic orphanages in the northern suburbs of Chicago with her 4 siblings.  At one point her birth mother had planned their murder by drowning in her car trunk.  The mother had a fifth child that was temporarily in the orphanage with them, but was taken to live with the mother after she married the father of the child.  The now Grandma explained that was hard for her and the others that remained orphans, to know that they were not to have a home, motherly love, and good food to eat that their youngest brother would have.

The little girl was taken away from her birth mother.  In a few months she will be officially adopted by the Grandma and Grandpa.  I didn't pry to find out the history, but for some reason DCFS has already granted the child a college scholarship.  I think I will pray the "Healing Your Family Tree" prayer for them.

I am sadder now writing this than I was sitting in the car hearing her story.  Part of it is that I just read this testimony from another woman that had two abortions.  She is a famous, and gifted blogger who is faithful Catholic and also very funny.  This post isn't funny.  It is courageous, and it is sad.  I cannot recommend it highly enough.  Please do whatever you are inspired to do.  You can sense the pain she has endured because of those two abortions.  Even though God will bring good from her witness, don't you just want to spread this story to others both to save the lives of the children, and also so they don't have the same grief to endure?

There is so much suffering, and sadness in this fallen world.  Still we have the gift of faith, and the confidence that we are loved.  We have the Gifts of the Holy Spirit that we can witness to God's steadfast love and kindness.  We can make a difference whether we are the repentent and forgiven sinner, or the innocent little kid, that has been both a victim and now the recipient of love from one that knows what it is like when your Mom doesn't act like a Mom should act.

Life is really intense and beautiful when you get the opportunity to interact with others grasped by Christ, and acting to support his causes.  One of the arguments someone used with me as to why abortion on demand isn't terrible is that it isn't a great loss to be denied a life where the mom doesn't want you or love you.

I think this little girl and her Grandma are evidence against that.  I want to say it is a lack of faith in the love of God to think that God isn't there in the midst of the little girl in the orphanage who does know the love of her siblings, and the nuns caring for and teaching her, and the experience of accepting Jesus as her Savior as an adult, and coming to know the faithful love of a husband.  Some would say that it would have been better if she would have been aborted than to have been born to a woman that would plot drowning her and her siblings in the trunk of her car.  But, she would say no.  She would testify that God has always cared for her and always shown her love and is strengthening her voice now to help persuade others not to commit the sin of abortion.

The little girl now has a Grandma and a Grandpa, gets to go to a great school, has great friends and birthday parties.  It is better that she lived.  God has acted to show her His great love through her Grandma and Grandpa, her teachers and friends.

Lord God, please bless all the women I wrote about in this post from the youngest little girl, to the high schoolers that came out to witness to your love and truth, to the adults praying and witnessing, some from experience.  Please bless and heal them.  Please change the hearts and minds of all that work to provide abortion services on demand.  Please convict them of the deliberate killing of innocents and give them the grace of repentance and conversion to turn to you and then in reparation to work to end this practice in our country and around the world.

Mary, our Mother, and the mother of these unborn and defenseless little ones, please pray with us that God's grace would change the hearts and minds in this country and around the world to stop this slaughter, and end the suffering of the women that are told it is OK, and then find out afterward, it isn't OK.  The pain tells them it is not OK.

If you are a girl that happened to find this post and you are pregnant, please know there are crisis pregnancy centers that can help you.  All you need is an internet connection and a phone for a start.  Here is a site that has links to local help lines and crisis pregnancy centers:  May God comfort, bless and strengthen you.  He loves you and your unborn child more than you can fathom!

I did a quick search and here are some actual words from girls forced to have abortions by their mothers:

Quote from the last one, "The biggest mistake in my life wasn't getting pregnant. The biggest mistake in my life was ending my pregnancy."


  1. I'm joining you in prayer for the women you wrote about. It's so heart breaking to watch a mom bring her daughter in for an abortion... what kind of message is that? And to be escorted in? I'm assuming your group is a peaceful prayer group that is not shouting obscenities or hate to the girls going in?

    The doctor at our local clinic gets escorted in by 2 staff and they all hurry as if they're in danger. Utter ridiculousness! Ours is a peaceful group and too far away from where the doctor parks for physical harm.

    God will bless you for your witness to the unborn by your presence at the clinic!

    1. No obscenities! Their are counselors that yell that Waterleaf is free and is a block away and they would like to help them. We have 5 girls at a time stand across the way so that the girls see someone their age. The girls are taught to show love and caring and not to judge or challenge the women walking in. What they do yell is, "Your baby is going to be beautiful. She could have your smile, your eyes, your laugh, your walk." I think I talked about his in my To Be Born post earlier in the month. I think the Mom didn't want any interference in her plan for her daughter to have the abortion, but that is my speculation. It is definitely peaceful! There are also others, like Knights of Columbus out there praying a rosary. There is one operational rescue gentleman with single graphic sign but you can only see that on the drive in, and he yells nothing, leaving the contact to the counselors. Our girls are being trained in sidewalk counseling this weekend, but from what I've read online they have already received good coaching. The sidewalk counselors actually highlighted our girls in a recent pro-life newsletter. I should find it and link to it!

      The escorts are because it is a business and there is about one woman every two months when we are there that walks out without having an abortion. The peaceful presence is cutting into their revenues! It is ridiculous. They have escorts there because ensuring the women come in go through with abortions generates more revenue than what they have to pay the escorts per hour to stand outside the center and accompany the women in, distracting them from any thoughts that they might choose life rather than death for the baby in their womb.

  2. I read the story by the blogger you mentioned and commend her for sharing her story. It took a lot of courage and honesty to write it. May God bless her and heal her wounds.

    I'm sure there are girls who are forced into abortions. I read a powerful story online once about this and I wish I could remember the name of the site. She's another blogger who chose to share her story with others and it was very powerful. She suffered silently for years and was full of anger at her mother. It took her many years to forgive both her mother and herself.

    Thank you for all you do for the little ones, Colleen. God bless.

  3. Thank you, Mary! If you find that blog post I would love to read it. I would like to share it with our girls. We already know that the reason Christian girls have abortions even though they know it is a sin is because they are afraid to tell their parents. I would speculate that the reason the parent(s) force their daughters to have abortions is because the want the best for their daughter and think that it would be best to make her mistake go away. It is immoral, but their love and good intention seem to make it licit for the moment, right? This is sounding judgmental . . . it is the only way I can understand it though. Once illogical and fallacious persuasion like 1 in 3 women has an abortion, or the intention and situation can make a gravely immoral act of murder permissible take root in the ethos of the society it becomes all the more important that we are deliberate in our efforts to persuade otherwise. Does that make sense?

  4. Yes, that makes sense. We are already seeing the bitter fruits of abortion in our country. First came contraception, then early abortions, then partial birth abortions. Now, even some of the babies on whom the partial birth abortions "failed" have been killed after delivery. There have been quite a few cases of this. This leads to a society where human beings in general become expendable(euthanasia or worst). People are playing god and tampering with life itself. It's a frightening picture, isn't it?

    Think Hitler. Babies, children, pregnant women, adults, the elderly - evil has no boundaries and when life is no longer considered sacred all hell can break loose.

    God's grace can do amazing things though! So I have hope!

    I found the blog on St. Blog's Parish but it was over a year ago and I can't remember the name of it. If I find it I'll let you know.

  5. Colleen, I blogged about abortion again and the 2 year anniversary of our prayer group that has every Thursday gone to pray at this clinic. I mentioned you and linked back to you. I included the personal stories you found online. So, incredibly sad!